Day after wedding

Wow- What a wonderful night!

ack...so much to do!

Ok, I know I have been among the missing lately. Apparently weddings are a lot of work with many many things to do!
And you have to do it all on no sleep!
I am doing well on the diet, altho I know the next week will be difficult with a lot of going out to eat with my sweetheart's family.
Going to pick up his parents & sister today and then the rest of his family tomorrow night.
I'm having them all here for a BBQ Friday night(IF we don' get the freaking hail storm they are forecasting...that I am convinced was forecast because I just brought all my house plants outdoors this morning at 5 AM....yeah five-freaking-AM! I woke up at 4:30, kept hoping to fall back to sleep and when I had so much whirling around in my brain, I thought my head would explode, I gave up, made coffee and did housework.
And brought the silly plants outdoors to decorate the patio!
Ok, gotta run, way too much to take care of!
For all the followers who are on the Ideal Protein plan, I wish you all fabulous luck this coming week.
And please everyone pray that I get everything done and have a perfect wedding day/night for me and my love!
And thanks!

Weigh-In #12

For the bad news-I was right about being up this week. I was way off for 3 whole days so it is not a surprise.
For the good news- my measurements over the last 12 weeks: my chest measurement is down 4", my waist is down 4", hips are down 4", arms down 2", and my freaking thighs are only down 1/2"!
My visceral fat has dropped from a 10 to a 7, my body fat has gone from 44.3 to 36.7 and my body mass index has gone from 30.3 to 26.
So, I am back on track today,no cheating and will drop the couple I gained over the next week and maybe lose a little more.
10 days until our wedding, one week until my fiance's family arrive from England.
My sweetheart just graduated with his bachelor's degree in history today. He received the Outstanding Senior award and another from the history dept and is suma cum laude. I am so proud of him! I love how smart he is! He isn't hard to look at either!

Before and After(not done dieting yet!)

So, we went to buy a new dress this morning and I did get lucky again! I liked my 1st dress a lot, but I love this new dress and I look so much better as a 12 than I did as a 16W! The only thing I am not crazy about is how straight across the neckline is. The 1st was the same but I had it made into a sweetheart style when I had it altered. It would be impossible with this new one as it's a corset style. I took the removable caplet/straps off the first dress and am having them put on the new dress. They match perfectly and enable me to wear a regular clear strap bra and not a strapless bra(which we all know do nothing for our shape, especially for 48 year old boobies!) And being the 1st dress was originally strapless, it looks good that way.
So, the only alterations this one needs is the straps being sewn on and the button and hooks for the bustle.
This dress was only $50 more than my other one and the woman gave me a $50 restaurants.com gift card to make up for it.
I hate that I had to spend more money but feel like I can't put a price on looking and feeling better and being a size 12!
I really have been eating all wrong for days but now that I have a skin tight dress, I am back on the wagon starting tomorrow. It will be an ugly weigh-in but it's my own fault for turning to food because of stress instead of something smart like exercise! I have made great changes but that is something that will need to be worked on for the rest of my life. Food is not my friend in time of need and I have to keep that in mind and also in practice.
After the wedding I'll worry about the last 15-17 pounds I want to lose.
So, you know anyone who wants to buy a beautiful wedding dress that was a 16W but altered to a 14 & has the bustle done already and it's only been worn for this picture and tried on for alterations? I'll sell it to you cheap! Seriously! Any takers?!?

OMG!!!!!!!

My wedding dress no longer fits!
I have been told that you can't turn a 16W into a 12!
I think I need to have a consignment shop try and sell it for me. I would try eBay but there are just way too many on there to get mine noticed.
I have been freaking out for 2 days and eating way too much, too. I am so stressed right now. My wedding is in 13 days and I have nothing to wear.
I actually showed my fiance and he said it's a beautiful gown but looks so big on you I don't think you can wear it.
We're going shopping 1st thing in the morning to look. I want him to understand the cost and not get mad at me for spending the money.
Pray I find one off the rack for a price I can afford that looks fabulous on me!
The dress I have is quite fancy w/ beading, etc. and I actually got it on clearance for a great price so hopefully will be that lucky again, but I am thinking a plain dress that fits and is flattering is better than a fancy dress that looks like it is going to fall off.
A big congratulations to Tina for her fantastic 1st week on Ideal Protein! 7 pounds! Yay! Way to go!
I will not worry about the diet for the next 2 weeks and will only try to maintain because I need the dress I WILL find tomorrow to fit!
Oh, yeah,and my friend's dog bit my hand (while I was trying to help her break up a fight between 2 of her crazy dogs)and I had to get a tetanus shot and go on antibiotics because the doctor thought it looked infected. So now not only does my hand hurt, my other arm hurts like hell where I got the shot!
WTF else can happen...I guess I shouldn't ask that question because I don't want to find out! Unless it's me winning the lottery!

Bachelorette Dinner

I am off to the dinner with my girlfriends and my sister.
I posted a picture of me in the dress I am wearing. It's the 11.5 weeks pic.
I bought that dress 3 years ago in California. I liked it but it was a little snug. At that point I had maybe put on 10-15 pounds from where I was when I quit Weight Watchers(I weighed 163 when I quit.) I figured it would give me a push to lose the weight but no, it hung in my closet waiting for me while I was gaining weight instead of losing.
I tried it on 2-3 weeks ago and it was just right although I felt I needed to wear shape wear underneath.
I went to wear it today and it's a little big now. I had to tighten up the straps and it's a bit baggy under the arms in the bodice. I am not wearing shape wear either. I'd probably look more smooth but didn't feel like squeezing myself into it for a dress that is a bit big!
The shoes I am wearing are my wedding shoes. I'm trying to get used to them. And the bows tied in with the bow on the dress.
I'm also wearing a fab vintage 1950s chunky bracelet and using my vintage 1950s brown crocodile purse. I am also bringing a little brown cardigan because it'll probably get chilly later on-it's 70 degrees right now.
I am not worrying about the diet tonight. I am having a couple drinks and eating whatever is served as I believe the girls who made the plan have pre-ordered for us.
I don't know who is coming other than 5 of the girls, I am guessing a couple others have been invited.
Have a great weekend everyone!

Weigh-In #11

I think I am down another 3 pounds. The nurse said 2.something and I think she said I was 167.2.
My brain is scattered right now and as soon as I walked out the door I was distracted and completely lost the actual number. Maybe she actually said I was 167.4, b/c then I would be down 2.8(which is 2.something and not 3) So maybe it isn't quite 3 but 2.8.
Whichever it is I'll take it! It means I am down about 29.5 pounds now! It's less on my scale in total for some reason so I'll go with the official count for total loss and the weight my scale says tomorrow morning being I am confused about the official numbers this week.
I'll try and pay more attention next week although that may not happen being next Wednesday will be only 10 days until the wedding! ack!
I just have so much on my mind right now! My fiance was waiting in the car so we could go to the bank to make another withdrawal and then to the venue where our wedding will be to make what we thought was the final payment but there was a charge I wasn't aware of so we still owe $144 to the venue and any tab that may be run after the open bar hours are over, in case anyone stays there after the reception is over. We have made payments every time we've gone over there for planning so when the day comes, we won't have to worry about large sums of money and can enjoy the day more and not think about what we've actually spent!
I have lost almost 6 pounds since the alterations so I doubt that would make a big diff in how the dress fits. When you're 5'7", 6 pounds barely shows! I will need to try it on again, maybe this weekend.
My sister will be down from the frozen tundra of Vermont for my "surprise" bachelorette party this coming Saturday night and has to come here at some point. Maybe I can try it on when she is here so she will get to see it and I will get to see how it fits. I'd kind of like more pictures of me in the dress so I can look at it against those scary ones that started me on this weight-loss journey with Ideal Protein.
I am wondering how my first follower Melissa is doing. I think she is back from her cruise, where I hope she didn't worry about her diet but just had a fabulous time!
And best of luck to my latest follower Tina for her 1st week. Everyone send out positive happy thoughts for a great week for all of us on the diet...and for the rest of the world too, we all need happy thoughts and positive energy! Not sure if any of you have noticed but there's bad stuff happening all over and humans and animals are suffering needlessly so the more positivity we feel and send out into the universe, the better off the world will be! Believing equals receiving.
I heard a great quote on Oprah today from either Oprah or the author of "Women, Food & God"
Do not try to feed yourself with that which cannot fill you.
Love that!

Shopping In My Own Closet

I used to love to go shopping, at least the times I was thin. Then as I gained weight, shopping was only something I did when I had to. Like when you realize you will have to buy new jeans in a larger size if you plan to breathe while wearing them! Or you have to go to a special event and stuffing yourself into a dress you own just won't work, because the flab is sticking out places where it shouldn't. Like around your bra and splooshing out from the under arm area of the dress....or the dread back-fat! Ew!
Being shaped like a pear(a rather large overripe pear!) I could often still get a size smaller in dresses than in pants and somehow this made me feel a little better about myself. I'd find something w/ a V-neck and an Empire waist(thank you Stacy & Clinton for your great advice every week!)so people's eyes would be drawn to the one thing a fat girl has(other than her sparkling personality!) to distract from the rest of her body-the boobs! I would say to myself, yes, I may be fat, but I have fabulous cleavage!
I'd put that new dress on and take care to make sure my hair and make-up were perfect and I'd look in the mirror and think I looked pretty damn good....never really taking in the whole picture, just the cleavage,face and hair. When I was naked, getting into our out of the shower or dressing and I'd pass that mirror, I would manage to avert my eyes...if I avert my eyes from the whole vision of myself I can pretend I don't look so bad.
I'd go to that event and have fun and then later I'd see pictures and be absolutely shocked to see myself-all of me-the me other people see.
I have now gotten rid of 2 big garbage bags and 5 grocery sized bags of clothes that are too big, gone are the 16s, gone are most of the 14s(some of which I am still wearing although they are too big so soon, they too will go)gone are the extra larges and some of the larges. Banished from my closet and my life!
I have gone through the bins I had in the back of my closet where I had all those 10s and 12s and mediums. I have tried on all my thin clothes and so many fit now. I still can't wear a 10 but soon I will! I am wearing clothes I haven't worn in 3 years. I am wearing clothes I didn't even remember because I haven't seen them in 3 years!
And shopping in my own closet was fun because it didn't cost me anything! Plus, I got to de-clutter, getting rid of all those big sizes. I will have less to pack and move to England come Summer.
And I have stood in front of that mirror and looked right at my naked self. While it isn't fabulous and Playboy won't be calling me anytime soon being I am 48 and don't exercise much, it also wasn't terrible. My legs and butt are still pretty big and jiggly and will take lots of working out to fix(which I know I need to get off my fat ass and actually do!) But I am looking pretty good and getting better all the time.
And I am starting think I will be gorgeous in that white dress in 18 days! Even though white is not at all slimming!

Monday May 10

Happy birthday to my fabulous niece Jessica who turns 28 today!
I have not been writing much lately. I am getting so busy with wedding stuff and working my eBay business as much as I can.
With us moving to the UK at the end of July, I have so much to sell off of our own stuff and stock we've bought at estate sales. I sell mostly cool vintage items-a lot of mid-century mod and kitchen items, such as old Pyrex patterns, vintage table linens, accessories, all sorts of things. If you are interested in that sort of thing my screen name on eBay is linbot1.
Plus, my in-laws will be coming soon and our apartment is small and so full of our eBay stock that it really looks like a stockroom for an antique shop! I need to try and get rid of all the larger stuff that takes up space.
I want to be able to host a couple meals here so really need to de-clutter as much as possible.
As for my diet, I still can't seem to get on track. I do think I am stressed and just don't want to think about dieting. I weigh 167.5 so am about the same as I was last week. I am sure I will lose a little bit by Wednesday weigh-in, though.

Week 10 Weigh-in...Woot!

So, I thought this was going to be a bad week and I ended up losing 2.8 pounds! Not bad at all! And I was wearing jean capris instead of the usual lightweight sweats I wear to weigh-ins....so I'd like to think I lost 3!
I am now 26.4 pounds down in total on the official scale! I think this might mean I am officially a size 12! I am, little by little going, through my clothes and weeding out. I have gotten rid of 2 garbage bags full so far and have a grocery bag full and more to try on.
I should sell it all on eBay, which I did the last time I lost weight...then I had to go buy bigger and bigger sizes again as I gained of course! Dammit!
I did keep my thin clothes, though, as I felt like I didn't get enough chance to wear them the last time I was this size!
The plan this time is to get all the way to goal and learn how to stay there! For once stay a healthy weight!
I am so happy the scale keeps going in the right direction. It is still under 3 lbs. per week which I am not thrilled with being the diet claims 3-4 per week for women but that's for people who don't cheat!...which we know I do...regularly!
I decorated candles for my wedding today. I am not particularly crafty(like at all!)so am pretty pleased they came out ok. Fancy candles cost a lot! I did all 3 for about $20 I think.

stupid advertisements!

I started to have the ads on the blog and they keep using ads for diet crap!
It is aggravating me but I can't seem to get them to change them to something more appropriate. They seem to think because my blog is diet related that diet products are a good fit which they most certainly are not.
This blog is about my journey with the Ideal Protein plan which I highly recommend being I have had some fabulous results.
It was not my intention to promote other plans and silly things that are often scams.
On the diet front, I didn't have a good weekend. We keep getting invited places and I can't seem to make good choices. I think doing this diet for all these weeks has me a bit burnt out and my willpower has fallen by the wayside. I need to get it back for the last little push until May 29th....which is right around the freaking corner!
I am not looking forward to my weigh-in tomorrow as I fear a gain or a stay the same. You are what you cheat!
On the wedding front, we went and got our marriage license today!
I am soooo tired! I keep waking up in the middle of the night and my brain starts swirling with things I have to do and then I am wide awake and toss and turn the rest of the night until it's time to get up! Ack! I need rest! This is stressing me out big time!
Hopefully tonight I will sleep better.
I'm so exhausted I don't even want to cook dinner. Maybe I'll talk my fiance into Chinese food-he isn't keen on take out other than pizza(which of course, I cannot have.)With Chinese I can make safe choices. I could go for shrimp and string beans w/ their oil free sauce on the side or some beef or chicken satay and string beans-yeah, that is safer being I don't know all what is in that sauce.
Talk to you all soon...when I am more awake!

Saturday 5/1

4 weeks until our wedding day!!!
I can't believe it!
My dress is altered so I have to try and lose no more than 5-8 pounds this next month. The seamstress was so fast! As I said, she is a feisty little Greek lady who does things her way. She did a fab job and it looks gorgeous on me! She really knows her stuff-love her! Although I wish she worked a bit slower so I could have lost more before the wedding!
I don't think I have ever had to be careful not to lose too much weight before in my life!
I am getting so excited about the wedding now!
I met my sweetheart through eHarmony 3 and a half years ago-September 2006. I bought myself a membership for my 45th birthday. I figured I had been trying to find a good match for years with crap results so why not let someone else do it for me! We got to the the open communication phase and emailed and then spoke on the phone-I melted listening to his English accent. Then we met half-way between where we lived for a drink(we lived 50 miles apart) and I remember sitting there thinking how cute he was and hoping he thought I was pretty and liked me.
Neither of us were interested in meeting anyone else within a few weeks(he was my 2nd date through eHarmony and I was his first.) About 6 weeks after we met he asked me to fly to England with him for Christmas to meet his family and I knew things were getting serious! He had dated a girl for 2 years before me and never brought her home!
By February we moved in together. It did take a long time and several heated discussions where I ended up crying because I wanted to take the next step and he was scared-so was I but I knew I wanted to marry him! He kept saying eventually we'd marry-does he know how long "eventually" is in girl-years?!?
We finally got engaged Christmas-time 2008 and decided to wait until 2010 to marry as my older sister was getting remarried last summer and we didn't want to step on any toes or steal any thunder because I really wanted to get married in Spring-time. I love summer a lot but didn't want to be sweaty on my wedding day! Spring is the time of rebirth-everything fresh and new.
Ok, that was so not diet related but a little background on me and my sweetheart!