April 19

This past Saturday marked 6 weeks to my wedding...aaahhhhhhhhhhh!
It's getting a bit scary and nerve-wracking. When I think about how fast it is all coming, I start to panic and feel like my heart is beating too fast. I am also having odd dreams. I am excited but nervous.
That being said, this has not been a good week for my diet. I felt renewed willpower, especially when my first follower told me her results. She is doing so well! I want to do that well, too!
Then it just sort of went out the window. My sweetheart keeps bringing goodies in the house and for six weeks I was able to say no thank you. What the heck was so different about this weekend?! Also, a dear friend sent baked goods to us, as well.
I have had this problem on other diets. Sometimes when I am doing really well, I will start sabotaging myself. I guess it's that self-fulfilling prophecy of thinking that I am fat and that my lot in life is to have to lose weight. Thinking I have had to do it before and will always have to diet. Do I somehow think I don't deserve to look fabulous and be beautiful?(because I do!)
These are things I have learned about and understand and know what is right inside my head-thank you Oprah-but somehow putting them into practice isn't so easy.
All I can do is try to be better the rest of the week until Wednesday weigh-in and whatever it says on that scale is just the result of this one bad week. Just this one, and nothing more.
Next week will be better and so will the weeks after that. And I am not this diet and I am not my weight and I am not my fears or my insecurities. I am all that and so much more...and soon to be all that and more in a smaller package!